Watermelon Gazpacho

In the midst of a heat wave the last thing I want to do is turn on my oven. Second only in kitchen aversion is using my stove. We don't have central AC in this tiny apartment, and so turning on the oven is akin to turning the entire kitchen into a sauna, and not the good kind. The ambient heat, having sapped my will to live, has come into conflict with my gluttonous desire to eat good food. Cold food is a must for these steamy days. Fortunately, both tomatoes and watermelon are in season.

Tomato and watermelon are surprisingly good together. This recipe, based on one by Anya von Brezmen, is surprisingly sparse on ingredients, for a gazpacho, but is perfect for hot summer nights. I think it works better as an appetizer, or aperitif, but it can pass as a light supper when served with cold sandwiches. Make sure you get fresh, juicy melons and tomatoes for this dish, and don't forget the celery. It's heightens the flavors and really brings things together. Don't worry, my friends. Flavorful refreshment is on the way.

Makes 4 servings.

Takes  10 minutes to make, and at least 2 more hours to chill.

Ingredients

4 cups cubed, seedless watermelon, about 1 1/4 lbs

1 lbs ripe tomatoes, cut into quarters

2 Tbl extra-virgin olive oil, more for dizzling

2 Tbl lemon juice, or more to taste

1/2 cup chopped celery

1/2 tsp Salt. more as needed

1/4 ground black pepper, or more, to taste

Thin celery sticks for garnish

Directions

Working batches, puree all of the ingredients except the garnish in a blender for at least two minutes, until smooth and frothy. Taste and adjust seasonings, adding more salt, pepper, and lemon juice as needed to make the flavor pop. Transfer to a bowl and chill for at least 2 hours, and up to 24 hours. Serve in individual bowls or mugs, garnishing with celery sticks. If there are any leftovers, which there probably won't be, they'll keep in the refrigerator for up to 3 days.

Spicy Beef Nachos

When I was in my early 20’s, nachos from the local convenience store were a staple food in my bachelor's life. Little did I know how much more they could be, beyond stale tortilla chips and hot cheese sauce. Little did I know how much better they would taste if I made my own. Being older and wiser, I’ve learned how to make killer nachos. Tasty, spicy, cheesy beef nachos that won’t last long once you set them on the table. They’ll be gobbled up too fast for any left overs.

Make sure to use very lean ground beef in this recipe. There’s a lot of cheese, and lots of cheese means lots of grease, if you’re not careful. I think these nachos have just the right amount of kick for a family dinner or gathering, but you can certainly spice them up more, or serve hot sauce on the side, if you like.

Equipment needed
Cutting board
Chef’s knife
Box grater
Measuring cups and spoons
Large skillet
Large spoon
9” x 12” baking dish, glass is preferred
Garlic press (optional)

Ingredients
1 yellow onion, finely chopped
1 clove garlic, minced
1 green bell pepper, finely chopped
2 green onions, thinly sliced
4 cups sharp cheddar cheese, grated
2 teaspoons canola oil
1 tablespoon chili powder
1/2 teaspoon cumin
1/2 teaspoon coriander
1/4 teaspoon dried oregano
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 pound lean ground beef (90% or leaner, preferred)
8 ounces tortilla chips (2/3 of a large bag)
1 1/2 cup tomato salsa
1 cup sour cream
Cooking spray

Directions
Place an oven rack in the center position and preheat to 400 degree Fahrenheit.

Heat the oil in a large skillet over medium heat until shimmering. Add the yellow onion and a dash of salt. Cook until softened, occasionally stirring, about 5 minutes. Stir in the garlic, spices, and salt. Cook about 30 seconds, until fragrant.  Add the ground beef and green bell pepper. Cook, breaking the meat up with a  spoon, until no longer pink, about 5 – 7 minutes.

Spray a 9” x 13” glass baking dish with cooking spray. Spread half the chips, evenly, over the bottom. Sprinkle half the beef mixture evenly over the chips, then sprinkle half the cheese over the beef. Repeat with remaining chips, beef mixture, and cheese. Bake until cheese is melted, about 9 minutes.

Remove from the oven. Dot with the sour cream and salsa. Sprinkle the sliced green onion over the top and serve warm.

Makes 6 servings

Roasted Bell Peppers, the Easy Way

There’s no reason to pay for a jar of roasted bell peppers when you can make them easily and affordably at home. All it takes is a good baking sheet, your broiler, and a bit of attention. Cutting the peppers and removing the seeds before roasting makes it easier to remove the skin, and lets you avoid rinsing them. Washing them removes much of the flavor, not just the skin.

Equipment Needed
Cutting board
Chef’s knife
Rimmed baking sheet
Aluminum foil
Mixing bowls
Plastic wrap

Ingredients
4 sweet bell peppers, red or green
Extra-virgin olive oil
Salt

Directions

 

Cut 1/4 inch from the top and bottom of each pepper and gently remove the stem from the lobe.

Lay the pepper on it’s side, and cut through one side the pepper, horizontally, rolling it as you cut, to remove the seeds and ribs in one fell swoop. Cut the pepper strips as needed to get them to lay flat.

Adjust the oven rack so that it is 2 1/2 to 3 1/2 inches from the boiler element. Head the broiler (500 °F) for 5 minutes. If your oven rack is more than 3 1/2 inches from the broiler, set an upside down rimmed baking sheet on it to raise the level.

Line a rimmed baking sheet with aluminum foil. Arrange the pieces of sweet pepper on the baking sheet, skin side up. Flatten them as needed. Cook under the broiler until the skin is spotty brown and puffed up, about 9 minutes. Rotate the sheet halfway through cooking to ensure even browning.

Transfer the hot peppers to a large bowl and cover with plastic wrap. Let them steam for at least 10 minutes or longer if they need to cool more so they can be easily handled. Peel and discard the skin from each piece.

The peppers can be stored in an airtight container for use in other recipes, but can also be served as an appetizer. Slice the peppers into strips, drizzle a little olive oil over them, and season with salt to taste.

Marinated Olives – Romantic Food

With Valentine's Day approaching, it's time to start thinking about romantic food again. This year, I'd like to take a more playful, and more intimate, approach to romantic food. Let's talk tiny appetizers.

Why appetizers? Mostly because they're small, easy to make, and you can feed them one by one to your sweetheart between light, exploratory smooching.

Let's start with marinated olives. You can actually buy pre-marinated blends these days, but they aren't cheap. Some are actually pretty good, but others ... well ... let's just say they leave you wanting, but not in a good way, as in, “I want more.” Instead, they leave you wanting as in, “I want my money back.”

The fun part of marinating your own olives is that it's easy and relatively inexpensive. You really just need some herbs and spices, a little oil and an acid. You can add a little sweetness by adding some wine, if you want. This recipe combines the fruitiness of the wine and the acid by using balsamic vinegar, but feel free to try your own variations.

Equipment Needed
measuring cups and spoons
medium sized bowl or jar with a lid.

Ingredients
2 cups mixed pitted olives, drained if needed*
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar
1/2 teaspoon dried thyme
1/2 teaspoon dried rosemary, crushed
2 cloves garlic, finely chopped
1/4 teaspoon red pepper flakes (optional)

Directions
Mix everything except the olives together in a bowl. Add the olives and toss. Cover and refrigerate for 1 or 2 days before serving.

Share them with your sweetheart as part of a romantic evening. If you don't have a sweetheart, snack on them while watching romantic comedies to kill the pain.

*Use a mixture your favorite black and green olives varieties. They can be plain or stuffed, whatever you like. Just avoid avoid the all too common “California” olives. These are actually green olives that have been chemically treated to make them turn black, and taste terrible when compared to other olive varieties. They don't have to be pitted, if you don't want, but it may ruin the mood if you're sweetheart cracks their teeth on them.

Photo by Yucel Tellici

Syrniki - Russian Cheese Pancakes

My attempt at making syrniki, bite sized cheese pancakes topped with raisins, is a tale of frustration, confusion and the Fall of Man in the kitchen. It is a sordid tale, not for the faint at heart. An epic struggle worthy of Mother Russia, the source of his recipe. Tolstoy only wishes he could have written this novel.

Well, short story. Is there anything shorter than a short story?

Oh, yeah. Blog post.

Okay. You're right. Tolstoy would have done it much better than I could. I told you this recipe had driven me into madness.

When I read the recipe in my Personal Trainer: Cooking program for the Nintendo DS I thought, “This is basically a cottage cheese pancake. That's sounds good. I've got all the ingredients on hand. I'll give it a try.”

This is how it starts, you know. The decent into hell. A small temptation leading to larger sins. But my stomach was growling and my mouth salivating. I was weak, and plowed forward into this evil recipe.

Equipment needed
Mixing bowls
Silicone spatula
Frying pan
Kitchen scale
Measuring spoons
Spatula

Ingredients
10 1/2 ounces cottage cheese
2/3 cup sugar
3 tablespoons beaten egg
2 tablespoons lemon juice
2/3 cup all-purpose flour
3/4 teaspoon baking powder
1 tablespoon cooking oil
3 tablespoons raisins

The Sordid Tale

“Wait,” I thought. “10 1/2 ounces of cottage cheese? 3 tablespoons of beaten egg? Who thinks in these terms? Chemists, maybe, but cooks? Who came up with this recipe?” This would not be the last time I wondered about this.

First, as the recipe directed, I put the cottage cheese into a mixing bowl and broke it up with the rubber spatula. I don't have a kitchen scale so, I estimated how much cottage cheese actually made up 10 1/2 ounces. In retrospect, I probably should have separated more of the whey than I did. The recipe didn't tell me to, though, and I didn't think about it.

Next I added the sugar and lemon juice and began mixing them in. Gradually I added the egg, mixing well, and wondered again, “3 tablespoons? Who came up with this thing?” not for the last time.

I had a little trouble with this. The eggs slopped out of my tablespoon measure and onto the counter, quickly taking a detour to the floor. “@&$%!” I cursed, taking my first steps into madness. I cleaned up the counter and floor and then beat another couple of eggs into submission.

Setting that aside, and quickly repenting for swearing, I took another large bowl and combined the flour and baking powder. I made a well in the center and added the cheese and egg mixture all at once, mixing it all into a thin batter. “This looks pretty thin,” I thought to myself. “A lot thinner than any pancake batter I've ever seen. I wonder if I should add more flour?” Ignoring my instincts, I forged ahead into the darkness.

Next, I put the frying pan over low heat and added the cooking oil, as per the instructions. Five minutes later I wondered when the oil was going to heat up. “What's going on? @&$%!” I cursed, again. “Is my stove messed up?”

I turned the heat up to medium and waited a little longer, just so I could get the oil up to a high enough temperature that I could actually fry something, and then reduced the heat to medium-low.

Adding the batter, one tablespoon at a time, to the frying pan, I waited for the “happy sizzle” sound I am so used to. I didn't get one. “Rats!,” I cried, trying not to swear this time. “What's going on?” Still, I decided to be patient and see what would happen.

Next, I put a few raisins on top of each bit of batter. “These will look pretty,” I thought. Oh, no, my dear brothers and sisters. This was but another temptation along the way to the Fall.

Ten minutes later, the four pancakes I had poured finally were ready to turn over. Oh, I had checked them before. But no. These didn't “nicely brown,” as the pictures showed. Oh, no. “Nicely browning” these cakes were not. They went from white to white with near black caramelized regions in nothing flat.

As I tried to turn them over, they squished themselves together into a sausage like mass. “@&$%!,” I repeated, furthering my trek towards into the depths, and vowed to do better with the next batch. “Who the @&$%! came up with the recipe?” I wondered, not for the last time.

I also wasn't going to wait twenty minutes for four pancakes, so I turned up the heat.

After more failed attempts at 'nicely brown' and more cursing, I started getting better at turning them over. As the first two batches were done, I got daughters involved with the tasting.

“Oh, these are sooooo good Dad!” they said. I had to admit, they didn't look like the pictures in the recipe, but they were pretty good, if a little squishy when compared to normal pancakes.

After each batch was done, I started eating them out of reflex. These were good. I started to realize that I was eating them faster than I was sharing them. Once again, bad behavior had led me to even worse behavior. “Who came up with this recipe?”

After taking pictures of the last batch, I attempted to repent. “Hey kids, do you want any more of these pancakes? There's four left.”

“No thanks, Dad. But make 'em again sometime, will you?” the girls responded, sweetly.

Rats. Just like any other addict, I couldn't make myself feel good if they wouldn't partake of the addicting substance with me. I ate them all in a moment of guilty gulping.

Looking back at the last hour of my life, the troubles, the cursing, and my need to repent, I said, “I don't know if I'll make these again, sweetie. They were kind of a pain.”

I told myself I would repent of cursing and being selfish, and never dip into the depths of that particular tempting recipe again.

Maybe.

Who came up with this recipe?

Potato Wedges with Sour Cream and Chili Sauce

If you're looking for a warm snack or a side dish for a good hamburger, these deep fried potato wedges make a nice replacement for the regular French fry. They're relatively simple to make and cook up pretty quickly.

Popular in Australia, this dish is served with sour cream and a sweet Thai chili sauce. When I'm ready to clean out my sinuses, that's great. On other days, I prefer to make my own super secret fry sauce recipe.

Ingredients

1 medium potato per serving
salt as needed
oil for deep-frying as required

Equipment Needed

cutting board
pan for deep frying
kitchen knife
mixing bowl
colander
heat resistant slotted spoon or small strainer
large plate
paper towels

Directions

Wash the potatoes, leaving the peels on. Cut the potatoes into wedges, about 3/4 inch thick on the outer edge.

Put the potato wedges into a bowl and cover with water. Let them soak for 2-3 minutes. This will remove excess surface starch and will result in a crisper potato.

Move the potato wedges to a colander and drain. Lay out some paper towels and put the potatoes on them in a single layer. Pat them dry. If there's any water on them when they get put into the hot oil, the oil will spit out of the pan and you may end up with a nasty burn.

A few years ago, this actually happened to me. I'll never make that careless mistake again. Trust me. I had small, painful burn marks on my face for a week, and the family photos to prove it. I looked like a guy with mutated acne.

Put out a plate and line it with a couple of paper towels. You'll use this plate to receive the potato wedges after they're fried. The paper towels will help absorb any excess oil.

Pour enough oil into a pan to just cover the potatoes. Place it over medium heat, heating it to about 350 degrees Fahrenheit. If you don't have a thermometer, drop a bread crumb in the oil. If if sinks about halfway before returning the to surface and sizzling, the oil's hot enough.

Using a heat resistant slotted spoon or small mesh strainer, put the potato wedges into the hot oil, one at a time so they don't stick together. Don't put too many potatoes in the oil at the same time. That will drop the temperature of the oil too much, and you'll end up with a greasy mess instead of a crispy fried potato. It's better to cook them in batches. Deep-fry until they start to turn golden brown.

Using the slotted spoon or strainer, remove the potatoes from the oil, letting the excess oil drip back into the pan, place them on the plate covered with paper towels. Immediately sprinkle a pinch of salt over the hot potatoes. If you wait, the salt won't stick to them.

Serve with sour cream and sweet Thai chili sauce, fry sauce, or any other dipping sauce you like. My wife likes to dip them in Ranch dressing.

Peanut Butter Tomato Canapes

Canapes are small appetizers made from plain or toasted bread. Normally they are spread with meat, cheese, caviar and so on. The variety of shapes and toppings are only limited by your imagination. This version features peanut butter, tomatoes, and feta cheese.

I first learned to make canapes by watching Jacque Pepin, an absolute hero of mine when it comes to cooking. (Don't blame him if you don't like these. He didn't make up the topping.) I included a lot of pictures, so you can better see how to deal with the bread.

While canapes are tasty, and can be quite elegant if done right, they can also be a lot of work to make. Depending on how many you're making, and how you cut them, they can get to be more trouble than they're worth. The first time I made them I swore I'd never do it again. It took me nearly a whole day and I wasted a lot of bread. It's gotten easier with each try, though. I discovered that the secret is just not to get too fancy with it all. This time, it took me less than an hour, and that included taking all the pictures.

Ingredients

1 loaf of bread
1/2 cup P.B. Loco Sun Dried Tomato Peanut Butter
dried crushed basil and ground black pepper to taste
1/2 cup feta cheese, crumbled

Set the broiler to 425 degree Fahrenheit and let the oven get hot while you prepare the rest.

If you don't have P.B. Loco Sun Dried Tomato Peanut Butter, use regular creamy peanut butter. Stir in 1/4 cup of caned diced tomatoes and 1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper. It's a different flavor, but it still works.

	Make a small cut (about an inch long) straight down, about 1/2 inch away from one edge of the loaf. This makes cutting the rest of the bread a bit safer by creating a “safety line” and gives you somethings to grab the loaf with, from time to time.
	Next, cut wide slices, lengthwise, across the top of the bread. Each slice should be about 1/ 3 of an inch thick. Cut down the “safety line” more as needed.
	You don't have to, but for this recipe I prefer toasting the bread. Place the slices on a flat sheet pan under the broiler for about 2 or three minutes per side, until they start to get lightly browned.
	Let the toasted bread cool so you can easily handle it. Spread the toast with a thick layer of the peanut butter.
	Next, trim the crusts from the bread to make even rectangles.
	Cut the bread into whatever shape you want: diamonds, wedges, squares, whatever. To make things easy for me, I cut them into smaller rectangles.
	Put the cut pieces onto the same sheet pan you used to toast the bread and sprinkle the tops lightly with basil, ground pepper and crumbled feta cheese. You can use plain or herbed feta, to your taste. I use a local brand, “Shepherds.” It's made in Erda, Utah, just a few miles north of my house.

Place the cut pieces under the broiler one more time, for about 2 minutes, until the peanut butter and feta start to melt.

Let them cool slightly before serving.

If you want to get fancy, and thin the bread out a little more, you can cut the toasted bread lengthwise, again, separating the two toasted halves from each other (this is how you make melba toast). Spread the peanut butter on the un-toasted side.

I like these just as well after they've sat in the refrigerator overnight. That way, the oils from the peanut butter that have seeped into the bread have re-solidified, giving the bread a nice texture and extra flavor.

Makes about 12 appetizers.

NOTE: If you've been paying attention, you've noticed there's one canape missing. My wife scarfed it up while I was distracted, crumbling the cheese.

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